Power failure?

If power supply fails in US, people check power office.
If power supply fails in JAPAN, people check fuse.
If power supply fails in INDIA, people check neighbour’s house…
sab ki gai hai na? to thik hein!

Insult Quotes SMS, Insulting Sayings

Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people.
I don’t know what makes you so dumb but it really works.
Anybody who told you to be yourself simply couldn’t have given you worse advice…
Hi there, I’m a human being! What are you?
Your village just called. They’re missing an idiot.
Shouldn’t you have a license for being that ugly?
I’m sorry, I’m a little busy. Can i ignore you later?
I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.
Don’t let you mind wander – it’s far too small to be let out on its own.
A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone’s feelings unintentionally.
Are you always this stupid or are you making a special effort today?
You can’t fix stupid.
And I thought I had problems? Look at your face!
Sure, I’ve seen people like you before – but I had to pay an admission.
If you took an IQ test, the results would be negative.
Sure, I’d love to help you out…now, which way did you come in?
The most effective comeback to an insult is silence.
Brains aren’t everything. In fact in your case they’re nothing.
I’d love to ask how old you are, but unfortunately I know you can’t count that high.
I have met a lot of hard boiled eggs in my time, but you’re twenty minutes.
All day I thought of you….I was at the zoo.
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
If you’re gonna be two faced.. at least try to make one pretty.
Don’t hate me because i’m beautiful, hate me because your boyfriend thinks I am.
He doesn’t know the meaning of the word “fear” – but then again he doesn’t know the meaning of most words.
For the love of God, do you at least remember what you were doing the day they were passing out common sense?
I won’t insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said.
Insults should be written in sand, compliments should be carved in stone.
If brains were taxed, you’d get a rebate.
Even rabbits insult an dead lion.
There are two insults no human being will endure: that he has no sense of humor, and that he has never known trouble.
You’re so fake, Barbie is jealous.
An injury is much sooner forgotten than an insult.
Never insult an alligator until you’ve crossed the river.
I may be fat, but i can exercise, you can’t fix ugly!
They just ran out of brains by the time you got there, so they gave you a nice wood carving instead.
A graceful taunt is worth a thousand insults.
Never insult anyone by accident.
Well, they do say opposites attract…so I sincerely hope you meet somebody who is attractive, honest, intelligent, and cultured.
To force a man to pay for the violation of his own liberty is indeed an addition of insult to injury.

Tintumon Jokes

Tintumon to Dundumol: Orikkal 3 per vellamadich caril pokukayaayirunnu.
onnaaman 1 peg, randaaman 2nd peg, moonnaaman 3 peg…
avarude vandi accidentil pettitt moonnaaman maatram rakshapettu…
endhu kond?
Dundumol: ???
Tintumon: Darwin’s Theory- Survival Of The Fittest…:)
`
Tintumonodu Dundumol: Njan marichal Tintu enthu cheyyum?
Tintumon: Njanum marikkum…
Dundumol: athentha, Tintuvinu njan illathe jeevikkan kazhiyille???
Tintumon: athalledee orupadu santhoshichal heart attack varumenna doctor paranjittullath…
`
English sir to students: give some examples using day:
Appukkuttan: Annual Day
Thomasukutty: Birthday
Tintumon: “Enthuvaaday”
`
Father watching F.TV.Suddenly tintumon come,
Father : paavappetta kuttikala, dress vaangan polum kashillathavara..
Tintumon : Ithilum paavappettavar vannaal vilikkane acha.!!
`
Tintumon ambalattil vazhipad counter Q vil..
Munnile uncle : shambhu, thiruvatira, paalppaayasam.
Tintumon: Hans, break dance, chickenbiriyani…!
Tintu Mon: Dad, there is a small PTA meeting @ school 2mrw..
Dad: Wat do u mean by ’small’ PTA meeting ?
Tintu Mon: Ya, just u, me & d Principal.!!! 
“Nashtappedaam, Pakshe
Pranayikkathe irikkaruth.” -KamalaSuraya
“pranayikkam pakshe thalayil aavaruth ”
-Prof.Tintumon
Gulfil ninnu Maman:Ninaku entha vendath?
Tintumon:Mobile mathi mamaa
Snehathode maman:NOKIA mathiyo da kutta.?
Tintumon:
Nokiyal porada pattee, Vaanganam !

What the Teacher Says and What they Really Mean …

1. Your son has a remarkable ability in gathering needed information from his classmates.
(He was caught cheating on a test).
2. Karen is an endless fund of energy and viability.
(The hyperactive monster can’t stay seated for five minutes).
3. Fantastic imagination! Unmatched in his capacity for blending fact with fiction.
(He’s definitely one of the biggest liars I have ever met).
4. Margie exhibits a casual, relaxed attitude to school, indicating that high expectations don’t intimidate her.
(The lazy thing hasn’t done one assignment all term).
5. Her athletic ability is marvelous. Superior hand-eye coordination.
(The little creep stung me with a rubber band from 15 feet away).
6. Nick thrives on interaction with his peers.
(Your son needs to stop socializing and start working).
7. Your daughter’s greatest asset is her demonstrative public discussions.
(Classroom lawyer! Why is it that every time I explain an assignment she creates a class argument).
8. John enjoys the thrill of engaging challenges with his peers.
(He’s a bully).
9. An adventurous nature lover who rarely misses opportunities to explore new territory.
(Your daughter was caught skipping school at the fishing pond).
10. I am amazed at her tenacity in retaining her youthful personality.
(She’s so immature that we’ve run out of diapers).
11. Unlike some students who hide their emotion, Charles is very expressive and open.
(He must have written the Whiner’s Guide).
12. I firmly believe that her intellectual and emotional progress would be enhanced through a year’s repetition of her learning environment.
(Regretfully, we believe that she is not ready for high school and must repeat the 8th grade).
13. Her exuberant verbosity is awesome!
(A mouth that never stops yacking).

Vishu Greetings SMS

Kanikkonnayum kanivellariyum
pon naanayavum kodimundum
puthen kaalathinte samrudhiyaakatte
vishudinaashamsakal..
`
Priya Kootukari.
Puthan Vasthramanijum
Vishu kani konna pottichum
Padakam Potichum
Vishu Aagoshikoo…
Vishu Aasamsagal…
`
Let us vow to take life in our strideImage this Vishu and make it tolerable as well as beautiful by accepting sorrow and happiness with sanity. Happy Vishu 2010
`
Let this VISHU give you the strength to do all that you dreamed to do during last year but didn’t dare to do. Wish you a happy and prosperous Vishu..
`
May the joyous ritual
of the harvest festival
fill your hear and home
with peace and contentmentHappy Vishu
`
I hope this Vishu will bring cheer,
prosperity and peace in your life.
Let us pray that we gain enough strength
to accept the highs and lows of life with equanimity .

Malayalam Vishu SMS Messages

Manasil ennum Kanikonna Virityatte,
Jeevithathil ennum Aiswaryam nirayatte
Oraayiram Vishu Aasamsakal. Happy Vishu.
`
Samrudhiyudeyum nanmayudeyum ulsavamaya vishuvinu ente hridayam niranja aasamsakal.
`
Orayiram kanikonnakal mansil pookunnu,
Oru Vishu kaalam koodi,
Vishu kaineetamayu ente hridayathil ninnum
Orayiram Vishu asamsakal..
`
Priyapetta Kootukara
Sreekrishna Bagavane
Vishukani kandu unarnu
Poothiriyum Lathiriyum kathichum
Padakam pottichum Sadya undum
Vishu Agoshiku. oru nalla nalekaayi.
Vishu Aasamsagal…
`
Let this Vishu give you the strength to do all that you
dreamed to do during last year but didn’t dare to do.
Happy Vishu! Let this be a delightful year,
filled with delightful things in each of its days.

Vishu Asamsakal…

Ormakal Koodu Kootiya manasinte Thalir chillayil,
Ponnin niramulla Orayiram Ormakalumayi,
oru Vishu koodi varavayi.
Othiri snehathode Orayiram
“Vishu Asamsakal”
`
Vishupakshipattum
kanithelichavum
kaineettathilakavum
medaponpulariyil
aishwaryamaakatte..
Vishu Ashamsagal. Let this New Year herald new optimism, zeal and cheer.
`
Wishing you a Vishu filled with lot of fun and happy. May this Vishu brings you luck and happiness to you and to your loved ones!
`
Vishu stands for new and fresh Life is always new and fresh Let us strive to make all days Vishu ..
`
Hope your “Vishu” is full of joy, Peace Prosperity and will prove to be wonderful, in every way for You. **Happy Vishu**