lipstick

jab tak rahti hai tere labo par stick
tab tak kahlati hai yah lipstick
jab chhooti hai yah mere galo ko
to banti hai cheek-stick
jab karti hai safar tere labo se
mere labo tak,
to ban jati hai love-stick
yu hi sazti rahe tere labo par
yah ever-smiling, ever-lasting…

Mohabbat

Spell Mohabbat
M – Maut
O – Oljhan
H – Haadsa
A – Aansoo
B – Barbaadi
B – Bewafai
A – Andhera
T – Tanhaai

Main hoon naa…

Hi To All…
after a long time i`m sharing this
shayari…hope u like it ….
ishq mein log izhaar kiya karte hain
ishq mein log ikraar kiya karte hain
hum to bas kwabon mein tumhara deedar kiya karte hain
chaand to ab bhi nikalta hain ,chaandni ke saath
magar hum , ab uska nahi,
intezaar tumhara kiya karte hain
us chaand mein bhi jhalak tumhari dekha karte hain
ab tumko hain kehnaa
kiska hain yeh tumko intezaar MAIN HOON NAA!!!!!!!!

Do U know the fullform of COLLEGE

C-Come,
O-On,
L-Lets,
L-Love,
E-Each,
G-Girl,
E-Equally……
Thats why boys go to college.

Train Journey

Sardar: I hav’nt slept all nite in the train.
Friend: Why?
Sardar: Got upper berth.
Friend: Why did’nt you exchanged?
Sardar: oye, there was nobody
2 exchange in the lower birth.

You are seeing my wife..

Sardarji & his wife going to city in auto.
Driver adjusted miror.
Sardarji shouted you are seeing my wife.
Go & sit back. I will drive auto…

Some funny SMS…

In a train, ticket checker to a saint: Ticket please!
Saint: I don’t have.
TT: Where do you want to go?
Saint: Lord Ram’s birth place, Ayodhya!
TT: Come, lets go!
Saint: Where?
TT: Lord Krishna’a birth place, Jail.
Default
People like YOU always remain forever
Beautiful flowers die….
Nice stories end……
Lovely songs fade…….. ..
Momeries are forgotten…
All things comes to end…..
But people like YOU always remain forever
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
BECAUSE GHOSTS NEVER DIE
A man was dying of cancer.
His son asked him:
dad why do you keep on telling
everyone that your dying of AIDS.
He replied:
“So that when I die no 1 will touch Ur mom”

Power failure?

If power supply fails in US, people check power office.
If power supply fails in JAPAN, people check fuse.
If power supply fails in INDIA, people check neighbour’s house…
sab ki gai hai na? to thik hein!

Insult Quotes SMS, Insulting Sayings

Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people.
I don’t know what makes you so dumb but it really works.
Anybody who told you to be yourself simply couldn’t have given you worse advice…
Hi there, I’m a human being! What are you?
Your village just called. They’re missing an idiot.
Shouldn’t you have a license for being that ugly?
I’m sorry, I’m a little busy. Can i ignore you later?
I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.
Don’t let you mind wander – it’s far too small to be let out on its own.
A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone’s feelings unintentionally.
Are you always this stupid or are you making a special effort today?
You can’t fix stupid.
And I thought I had problems? Look at your face!
Sure, I’ve seen people like you before – but I had to pay an admission.
If you took an IQ test, the results would be negative.
Sure, I’d love to help you out…now, which way did you come in?
The most effective comeback to an insult is silence.
Brains aren’t everything. In fact in your case they’re nothing.
I’d love to ask how old you are, but unfortunately I know you can’t count that high.
I have met a lot of hard boiled eggs in my time, but you’re twenty minutes.
All day I thought of you….I was at the zoo.
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
If you’re gonna be two faced.. at least try to make one pretty.
Don’t hate me because i’m beautiful, hate me because your boyfriend thinks I am.
He doesn’t know the meaning of the word “fear” – but then again he doesn’t know the meaning of most words.
For the love of God, do you at least remember what you were doing the day they were passing out common sense?
I won’t insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said.
Insults should be written in sand, compliments should be carved in stone.
If brains were taxed, you’d get a rebate.
Even rabbits insult an dead lion.
There are two insults no human being will endure: that he has no sense of humor, and that he has never known trouble.
You’re so fake, Barbie is jealous.
An injury is much sooner forgotten than an insult.
Never insult an alligator until you’ve crossed the river.
I may be fat, but i can exercise, you can’t fix ugly!
They just ran out of brains by the time you got there, so they gave you a nice wood carving instead.
A graceful taunt is worth a thousand insults.
Never insult anyone by accident.
Well, they do say opposites attract…so I sincerely hope you meet somebody who is attractive, honest, intelligent, and cultured.
To force a man to pay for the violation of his own liberty is indeed an addition of insult to injury.

Tintumon Jokes

Tintumon to Dundumol: Orikkal 3 per vellamadich caril pokukayaayirunnu.
onnaaman 1 peg, randaaman 2nd peg, moonnaaman 3 peg…
avarude vandi accidentil pettitt moonnaaman maatram rakshapettu…
endhu kond?
Dundumol: ???
Tintumon: Darwin’s Theory- Survival Of The Fittest…:)
`
Tintumonodu Dundumol: Njan marichal Tintu enthu cheyyum?
Tintumon: Njanum marikkum…
Dundumol: athentha, Tintuvinu njan illathe jeevikkan kazhiyille???
Tintumon: athalledee orupadu santhoshichal heart attack varumenna doctor paranjittullath…
`
English sir to students: give some examples using day:
Appukkuttan: Annual Day
Thomasukutty: Birthday
Tintumon: “Enthuvaaday”
`
Father watching F.TV.Suddenly tintumon come,
Father : paavappetta kuttikala, dress vaangan polum kashillathavara..
Tintumon : Ithilum paavappettavar vannaal vilikkane acha.!!
`
Tintumon ambalattil vazhipad counter Q vil..
Munnile uncle : shambhu, thiruvatira, paalppaayasam.
Tintumon: Hans, break dance, chickenbiriyani…!
Tintu Mon: Dad, there is a small PTA meeting @ school 2mrw..
Dad: Wat do u mean by ’small’ PTA meeting ?
Tintu Mon: Ya, just u, me & d Principal.!!! 
“Nashtappedaam, Pakshe
Pranayikkathe irikkaruth.” -KamalaSuraya
“pranayikkam pakshe thalayil aavaruth ”
-Prof.Tintumon
Gulfil ninnu Maman:Ninaku entha vendath?
Tintumon:Mobile mathi mamaa
Snehathode maman:NOKIA mathiyo da kutta.?
Tintumon:
Nokiyal porada pattee, Vaanganam !

What the Teacher Says and What they Really Mean …

1. Your son has a remarkable ability in gathering needed information from his classmates.
(He was caught cheating on a test).
2. Karen is an endless fund of energy and viability.
(The hyperactive monster can’t stay seated for five minutes).
3. Fantastic imagination! Unmatched in his capacity for blending fact with fiction.
(He’s definitely one of the biggest liars I have ever met).
4. Margie exhibits a casual, relaxed attitude to school, indicating that high expectations don’t intimidate her.
(The lazy thing hasn’t done one assignment all term).
5. Her athletic ability is marvelous. Superior hand-eye coordination.
(The little creep stung me with a rubber band from 15 feet away).
6. Nick thrives on interaction with his peers.
(Your son needs to stop socializing and start working).
7. Your daughter’s greatest asset is her demonstrative public discussions.
(Classroom lawyer! Why is it that every time I explain an assignment she creates a class argument).
8. John enjoys the thrill of engaging challenges with his peers.
(He’s a bully).
9. An adventurous nature lover who rarely misses opportunities to explore new territory.
(Your daughter was caught skipping school at the fishing pond).
10. I am amazed at her tenacity in retaining her youthful personality.
(She’s so immature that we’ve run out of diapers).
11. Unlike some students who hide their emotion, Charles is very expressive and open.
(He must have written the Whiner’s Guide).
12. I firmly believe that her intellectual and emotional progress would be enhanced through a year’s repetition of her learning environment.
(Regretfully, we believe that she is not ready for high school and must repeat the 8th grade).
13. Her exuberant verbosity is awesome!
(A mouth that never stops yacking).

Vishu Greetings SMS

Kanikkonnayum kanivellariyum
pon naanayavum kodimundum
puthen kaalathinte samrudhiyaakatte
vishudinaashamsakal..
`
Priya Kootukari.
Puthan Vasthramanijum
Vishu kani konna pottichum
Padakam Potichum
Vishu Aagoshikoo…
Vishu Aasamsagal…
`
Let us vow to take life in our strideImage this Vishu and make it tolerable as well as beautiful by accepting sorrow and happiness with sanity. Happy Vishu 2010
`
Let this VISHU give you the strength to do all that you dreamed to do during last year but didn’t dare to do. Wish you a happy and prosperous Vishu..
`
May the joyous ritual
of the harvest festival
fill your hear and home
with peace and contentmentHappy Vishu
`
I hope this Vishu will bring cheer,
prosperity and peace in your life.
Let us pray that we gain enough strength
to accept the highs and lows of life with equanimity .

Malayalam Vishu SMS Messages

Manasil ennum Kanikonna Virityatte,
Jeevithathil ennum Aiswaryam nirayatte
Oraayiram Vishu Aasamsakal. Happy Vishu.
`
Samrudhiyudeyum nanmayudeyum ulsavamaya vishuvinu ente hridayam niranja aasamsakal.
`
Orayiram kanikonnakal mansil pookunnu,
Oru Vishu kaalam koodi,
Vishu kaineetamayu ente hridayathil ninnum
Orayiram Vishu asamsakal..
`
Priyapetta Kootukara
Sreekrishna Bagavane
Vishukani kandu unarnu
Poothiriyum Lathiriyum kathichum
Padakam pottichum Sadya undum
Vishu Agoshiku. oru nalla nalekaayi.
Vishu Aasamsagal…
`
Let this Vishu give you the strength to do all that you
dreamed to do during last year but didn’t dare to do.
Happy Vishu! Let this be a delightful year,
filled with delightful things in each of its days.

Vishu Asamsakal…

Ormakal Koodu Kootiya manasinte Thalir chillayil,
Ponnin niramulla Orayiram Ormakalumayi,
oru Vishu koodi varavayi.
Othiri snehathode Orayiram
“Vishu Asamsakal”
`
Vishupakshipattum
kanithelichavum
kaineettathilakavum
medaponpulariyil
aishwaryamaakatte..
Vishu Ashamsagal. Let this New Year herald new optimism, zeal and cheer.
`
Wishing you a Vishu filled with lot of fun and happy. May this Vishu brings you luck and happiness to you and to your loved ones!
`
Vishu stands for new and fresh Life is always new and fresh Let us strive to make all days Vishu ..
`
Hope your “Vishu” is full of joy, Peace Prosperity and will prove to be wonderful, in every way for You. **Happy Vishu**

Thought Of The Day

Naughty thought for the day -
“It is really hard to wait for the right person in life. Especially when…
The wrong ones are damn attractive!!

SMS Jokes Collection

Dad: “When I beat you how do you control your anger??”
Tintumon:”I start cleaning the toilet”
Dad:”How does that help??”
Tintumon:”I clean it with your tooth brush”
`
Best punishment to a boy:
Give him a mobile phone, with lots of balance and girls phone numbers and leave him at a place where there is no network.
`
A Cat was very sad coz he didn’t have any girl friends
1 day he saw a beautiful lady cat .
He went and said 2 her
“MEOW”
`
Introducing T20 format in exams
*Reduce exam time by 1hr and marks by 50
*Introduce breaks after each 15 minutes
*Give free hit marks for unexpected questions
*first 30 mins power play no supervisor in the class
*Cheer girls in every class they will dance when we take an additional sheet!!

Secret Of Happy Life

Secret of happy life…..
Get a girl who cooks well
Get a girl who loves you
Get a girl look good
Make sure the 3 girls don’t meet each other!!

Tintumon Jokes in Malayalam

Dundumol bus stopil nilkunnath tintumon kandu… Avan poyi dundumolku kiss koduthu….
Deshyathode dundumol : chi…nee entha cheyyunne…?
Tintu: L.K.G yil padikunnu…
`
Malayalam classil teacher kuttikalodu…
teacher: panjasara enna vaaku vaakyathil prayogichu aarenkilum oru vaachakam parayu.
tintumon: njaan innu raavile oru glass chaaya kudichu
teacher: ithil panjasaara enna vaaku illallo
tintumon: panjasara chaayayil cherthitundaayirunnu sir…
`
Head masterinodu tintumon..
tinumon: sir eniku oru swabhaava certificate tharanam
hm: ninakku swabhava certificate venamenno, athinu ninte swabhavam enthaanennu enikariyillallo
tinumon: maryaathakku thaado allenkil ente swabhavam nee innu ariyum !
`
Tintumon:- achaa njan innale oru swapnam kandu.
achan:- enthaayirunnu athu?
tintumon:-achan innale swargathil irunnu pathram vaayikkunnu.
achan(santhoshathode):-ennittu?
tintumon:- appol thanne enikku athu swapnamaanennu manassilaayi.
`
World cup nediyappol Ronaldo shirt oori.
20-20 cup nediyappol Dhoni shirt oori.
ithu vayicha Tintumon: Dhaivame… Sania Mirza Wimbledon jayikkane..
`
Tintu pennu kanan poyi
Tintu: kutty eduvare padichu
Penkutty: BA
Tintu: kallippenne verum 2 aksharam padichu. Adum thala tirichano padichad !

Love SMS Collection

The pain is not on the day of missing ur dear ones..
The pain is really wen v live each day witout them & with their presence in our mind.
`
A small superb quote,” I nothing lasts 4ever…
Can i b ur nothing ?”
`
If u hav reasons 4 liking sum1. Then u r using ur mind. But if u lyk sum1 4 no reason. Then u r using ur heart.
`
Inbox is emptyOutbox is emptyDraft is emptybut..
U & UR memories r overloaded in my HEART BOX.
`
I’ve a pair of eyes but can’t see u everyday !I’ve a pair of ear but cant hear ur voice everyday !But i’ve only one heart tat remembers u every second..
`
Care & affection is not a business wher u give wen u get..
It is a beautiful feeling 4 sum1 wher u luv 2 giv even if u don’t get..
`
Troublin and torturin r gift frm d luvd 1.
We think abt d trouble dey giv.But v don know tat v r goin 2 miss dem in d furture.
`
D MOST CRITICAL MOMENT IN LIFE:Wen sum1 vry spcl hurts u so deeply, causes tears in ur eyes n ask,” Wat happend ?” bt u just reply ,” Nothing ”
`
world’s most beautiful sentence:”..But, I like u “World’s most painful sentence:” I like u, but..”Words r same, but where they r placed matters a lot.
`
Don’t fall in luv wit sum1 u can liv with..fall in luv wit sum1 u can’t
liv witout..

My SMS Collections..

Absence must be long enough
that somebody missses you..
But it should not be so long that
somebody learns to live without you..
`
Koi aankhon se baat kar leta hai.
Koi aankhon aankhon mein mulaquaat kar leta hai..
Mushkil hota hai jawab dena,
Jab koi Khaamosh rehkar bhi Sawaal kar leta hai…!!
`
Dil ki hasrat zubaan par aane lagi.
Aap ko dekh zindagi muskurane lagi..
Woh therri mohabbat thi ya meri deewangi…
jo har surat mein terri nazar aane lagi…!!
`
Labo ki hasi terre naam kardenge..
Har khushi tujhpar kurbaan kardenge…
Jis din hogi kami mere dosti mein….
us din zindagi ko maut ke naam kardenge…!!

You are not responsible for what people think about you…

You are not responsible
for what people think about you…..,
but, you are responsible
for what you give them to think about you…..!!

Sweeter Sides of Life…

[1] Sweeter Sides of Life
Boy Friend is like a chocolate, “Taste good always.”
Girl Friend is like Pizza, Hot’ n’Spicy, “Delicious anytime.”
Wife is like the refrigerated left overs, “Eaten when no choice.”
Husband is like a cooled off Tea in a cup, “Headache on sip.”
[2] Better Dead than Alive
A bachelor Man asked his physician, “I Want to live healthy and longer.”
The Doctor advised, “Good thought, Get married.”
The man asked, “Oh you mean the exercise of sex will make me live longer.”
The Doctor said, “No it is the want of sex that will kill your thought.”
[3] An Alien Observation
“A great handshake was observed in two humans of opposite sex at a wedding ring before a deadly bout of Lifetime.”
[4] Respect to a Dead Union
A husband reminded the wife, “Tomorrow is our wedding anniversary and I want to start the day with two minute’s in silence.”
[5] Love Kills
Marry with Love or have someone arrange it for you and then love. What the hell is the difference? Ultimate is the same, “Suicide of Harakiri or Killing of Guillotine.”
[6] Strange Divinity
And God makes such a beautiful, lovely, pleasant, marvelous creature as woman for man, then suddenly he turns around and sticks him as wife.
[7] Senseless and Careless
A man before marriage stays awake happily whole night contemplating about the wordage of lover woman.
Then after marriage he starts snoring faster then loving wife utters the first word.
[8] Wise Saying
Your money gets transferred faster than lightning When you marry.
[9] For unmarried only
“Happy Independence Day.”
[10] Grass is greener on other side
Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends.
You order the best dish of your choice from the menu and yet damn you find your friend’s dish more alluring.
[11] Decent Burial
A just recently divorced, hit hard, badly publicized, rich man received a telegram.
“Your Ex-wife dead. Advise preference burial or cremation? Funeral cost you pay.”
The man quickly responded, “Burn the Body high flames and Bury the Ash deep grounds. I pay all the expenses.”
[12] Wild Fiction
A just engaged man goes in the Library to search books on “The sex and my woman.”
He asked the female librarian, “Ma’ am, I want the book something like, “Master of my woman.”
The librarian advised, “Our fiction and fantasy books are in the basement.”
[13] Promise Keeper
Once a man told then his lover, “Marry me, I would even go to hell for you.”
The girl trusted the promise and married him.
The Man kept his words, “He is going through the hell of his life for now his wife.”
[14] Never drying tears
A woman brings you in this world with you crying and other one keeps you alive in this world with you crying.
[15] Law of Double Jeopardy
The Law does not permit a man to marry a second woman.
The Law cannot punish a man twice for the same offense!

The World Is Waiting For You..

Do not be afraid to shine.
The world needs what you have to give.
Open up the areas of your being;
Expose them to yourself – to others.
You are valuable. You are unique.
You have much to give.
Do not be afraid to give it.
As we risk ourselves, we grow.
Each new experience is a risk.
We can try, and maybe fail,
And, as a result, grow or hold back and stagnate.
You have the potential to be anything you want.
You are free to choose.
You are limited only by your fears.
Let your dreams take over.
Fly with the eagles. Soar into life.
The world is waiting for you.